What are they going to do, send me to Vietnam?

Written by Bernie Weisz Vietnam Historian January 8th, 2010 Pembroke Pines, Florida e mail address: BernWei1@aol.com I have read literally hundreds of memoirs written about combatant's experiences in Vietnam. Usually, I have found that the most accurate ones were written prior to 1980-with the war still fresh in that particular veteran's mind. However, Jack Stoddard's "What Are They Going To Do, Send Me to Vietnam" will not only give the reader the sights, smells and sounds of Vietnam War, but the feelings that Stoddard suppressed for close to thirty years, i.e. the themes of "survivor's guilt", and "P.T.S.D.", etc. will come flying out of it's "three-decades old" floodgates. Stoddard never wanted to write this book. In fact, he went out of his way not to discuss his experiences, his losses nor his nightmares. In the beginning of this book, Stoddard gives only a "half-truth" as to why he wrote this book. Explaining as such, he wrote in 2000: "I wrote this book because like a lot of other Vets, I couldn't tell my own sons about Vietnam, but I knew I must. There are thousands of other kids like mine, and parents out there who only want to know what their fathers or sons went through and why they still carry the burden of war with them today. This book offers no political opinions nor is it judgmental of Vietnam or the war. Rather, it is a collection of true stories about the exciting, humorous, and sometimes frightening adventures I experienced during my 2 1/2 years of combat. This book tells it like it really was, at least for me". The other half, Stoddard revealed at the book's conclusion, the last truth of the germination of this story that almost never was told. Stoddard concludes: "I couldn't help but think of the past and how my wife encouraged me to write this book about the way Vietnam really was. About good men doing an impossible job as best they could. Not killers, but boys who became men long before their time-some who came home, and some who didn't." As mentioned, in all of the memoirs I have read, there are certain cliche's that came out of Vietnam, such as "364 days and a wake-up", "Going back to the World", "Flying on that Freedom Bird", but my all time favorite was the title of this book. So, what does "What are they going to do, send me to Vietnam" mean? Found throughout the book as a sarcastic comeback to an unpopular order or request by an incompetent superior of Stoddard's, it is explained in the forward by Tom White. White was the Brigadier General of the Blackhorse Regiment and Stoddard's platoon leader in Vietnam. The Blackhorse Regiment was the nickname for the 11th Cavalry, where it was assigned in Vietnam and Cambodia for 1,639 days, with it's troops earning 11 battle streamers. In fact, the 11th Armored Cavalry Regimental Commander (ACR) was Col. George S. Patton III and the Air Cavalry Troop commander was Major John C. "Doc" Bahnson, who also wrote an excellent memoir called "American Warrior". White explained the title as such: "In choosing the title for this book, the author has picked the perfect expression to capture the essence of his text. First of all, that phrase suggests that this book is not a book about the grand strategy of the Vietnam War. Thank God! For those of us who fought in that war, we would agree unanimously that if there ever really was a strategy in Vietnam, it certainly was not grand. Instead, Stoddard titled his book with a phrase instantly recognizable by every Vietnam veteran and repeated throughout the Army over a period a thousand times over. It suggests a certain irreverence to authority combined with a dogged determination to get on with the task no matter how dangerous or difficult it may have been. It captures in a phrase the spirit and the common bond shared by soldiers in Vietnam". Tom White never wrote his memoirs. However, he understood why Stoddard would never had wrote his without his wife's prodding, and explains why he can't bring himself to do it. White rationalized the aforementioned as such: "We were young men who, at the time, never concerned ourselves with the grand strategy or the politics or whether the war was right or wrong. The war was there and we were there and we were going to accomplish our mission to the best of our ability because that was the best way to stay alive. We were proud of our unit, valued our friendships, and did the best we could to care for our buddies, That is why the losses were so personal and the hurt has continued for so long". All of the aforementioned themes White mentioned will come out strong in this book, as the following statement by Stoddard confirms White's analysis: "Every soldier who walks the earth has a story. This is mine, or at least the part of my life when I felt the most alive while at the same time being the closest to death. I was a 22 year old professional soldier who already had 5 years experience under his belt when I arrived in Vietnam in 1968. I developed everlasting bonds of friendship, trust, honor, and hope with my closest buddies who were also proud to be called soldiers. there were no Rambo's, dopers, or insane killers in my book; just a group of young soldiers, like myself, who were scared most of the time, but had too much pride to show it. We were too busy taking care of each other and just putting up with the daily crap that goes along with any war". When I read a memoir about the Vietnam War, I judge it's accuracy and historical usefulness by the subtle messages and nuances of the conflict that no history book will dare publish. In "What Are They Going to Do, Send Me to Vietnam", I was not disappointed. Stoddard takes the reader on his trips as a commander of his 50 ton M48 tank, called the "Double Duce" and you walk with him on patrol as a squad leader of the elite all volunteer Aero Rifle Platoon of Col. Patton's 11th Armored Cavalry Regiment. Right in the first story, the reader gets a feel of the futility of this war. Stoddard wrote about feeling isolated, not knowing a single soul on the 18 hour commercial airliner that took him from Travis Air Force Base, in Vacaville, California packed with 300 other youths bound for Vietnam with stops in Hawaii and Guam. His comment when first deplaning was classic: "By the time my feet hit the bottom of the ramp, I had learned my first lesson in Vietnam: There was no cool breeze. That hot sticky feeling that bothered me inside the plane surrounded me on the ground too. As soon as we deplaned, we were loaded on big blue air Force buses with wire screens covering the windows to be taken to the 90th Replacement Battalion at Long Binh, about an hour from the air base. The young soldier sitting next to me smiled and asked the driver, "Why all the screens? To keep us from getting out? The overworked driver replied matter-of-factly, "No, it's to keep the grenades from coming in". The soldier's smile quickly disappeared as he turned to me and asked, "He's kidding, right?" However, the U.S. game plan of "winning the hearts and minds of the Vietnamese people never worked. The driver was not kidding. In fact, one of the major issues our troops faced was the farmer or mama san working legitimate jobs during the day, and changing into a Viet Cong at night. Who was our ally and who was our foe? Could this confusion have contributed to what happened at My Lai 4? Many "friendly fire" incidents occurred during this war, in part indirectly attributable to this problem. In fact, "friendly fire" killed Chris Cordova, Stoddard's driver and good friend on the "Double Duce" four months after Stoddard D.E.R.O'sed back home (returned to the U.S.). The reader will feel Stoddard's remorse and survivor's guilt over Cordova's death. After his arrival in the summer of 1968, Stoddard was assigned to "M Company" near Xuan Loc, home of the "Blackhorse Regiment". His first assessment of Vietnam was classic: "It was hard adjusting to the constant heat and humidity. Everything in the 'Nam seemed to sweat. The canvas covering our hooch was mildewed and the smell was overwhelming. It was just too hot to sleep. It was like being in a furnace. Even my lungs were burning". However, Stoddard also revealed a beauty to Vietnam rarely told by the history books. On his first Chinook flight over the terrain, he remarked: "Within a matter of minutes, we were flying over what appeared from the air to be a peaceful jungle. Being naive, I thought this was just too pretty a place for a war. The edges were a light green as new vegetation tried to reclaim the areas that had been cleared by local farmers for their rice paddies. Then the jungle took on a darker green as the younger trees mixed with the older taller trees forming, in effect, a double canopy jungle. Soon we flew over even darker sections of almost black terrain. Three layers of trees had formed together. At that point, the foliage became so thick it was almost impossible to see through it from the ground or air. I learned from one of the old-timers that this was called, logically, a triple canopy jungle. It looked so beautiful flying over that I couldn't wait to venture into my new surroundings". Little did Stoddard know at the time, but what he was describing was the exact justification the U.S. Government used to spray "Agent Orange" or Dioxin-which was a cancer causing, environmentally poisoning defoliant used to deny the enemy this sanctuary that gave refuge to the N.V.A. and Viet Cong in hiding from our forces. After arriving "in country", Stoddard was assigned to a tank company that wouldn't have an officer until the next week. Getting a call to move out on a tank newly given to him, two occurrences happened to Stoddard that set the tone for the entire war. Despite being in the military for five years prior, in his first call into action, Stoddard remarked: "As we rolled out of the perimeter, all kinds of new thoughts and questions filled my mind. Were we going to a major battle? Back to base camp? I didn't have any ammunition. When or how would I load my rifle? What am I supposed to look for? I finally decided to just hold on and keep my mouth shut". So much for preparing our troops for combat! After a battle with the infamous "wait a minute vines" (they were the tentacles of giant prickly vines that attacked and tormented ground troops and tankers) Stoddard had to be medically evacuated to a rear aid station to have the tentacles removed from around his eyes. Stoddard made a comment that represented the "American fighting spirit" to prevail in this war as follows: "I remember thinking, how could anybody work all day in this unbearable climate? It was only the middle of the afternoon and I was already soaked to the skin and physically drained by the heat. Just think, only 359 days to go!" In his story of "Guarding The Runway", Stoddard's tank platoon of "M" company was based at Xuan Loc. This was right after the Tet Offensive had just started and N.V.A. and V.C. units were infiltrating most of the cities. Stoddard's tank company was split in half, with 10 tanks going to Bien Hoa, the other 10, including Stoddard, going to protect Long Binh. After spotting and being ordered to destroy an enemy 51 caliber machine gun nest hidden in the bell tower of an old French Church, Stoddard described attacking the target as well as the resulting death of it's occupants. However, as a reflection of the U.S. pursuit of the war in general, Stoddard made a very interesting comment. He wrote: "Before we could move to our second target, word came down from higher command for us to get our tanks out of the city. Our tanks were destroying too many buildings maneuvering in the narrow side streets. We were doing more damage than the enemy". In reading this, I wonder how General William Westmoreland ever thought that he could see "light at the end of the tunnel". Since when did our tanks upon entering Germany in April, 1945, worry about damaging or destroying German architecture, certainly more sophisticated and antiquated then in Long Binh? In his story "What, Me Hurt?" Stoddard injured his hand trying to repair a thrown track on his tank. Accidentally getting his hand pinned and almost crushed, he once again had to be medically evacuated by helicopter. While he was being treated, three medevac choppers brought a load of dead and wounded soldiers in to be worked on, which Stoddard gruesomely witnessed. Finding out that his hand was only jammed, he was given pain pills, told he was okay and to report back to his company. His thoughts were recorded as such: "I felt better as I walked back to the orderly room. As a matter of fact, after what I just witnessed, it felt good to be alive. I sure never wanted to go back there ever again. Instead of going directly back to my company, I stopped off at the Non-commissioned Officers Club and had a beer. Sure, I wasn't supposed to be there (NCO clubs are only for officers, a rank Stoddard didn't possess), but what were they going to do, send me to Vietnam"? One would have to be in Vietnam to understand the following, which certainly indicated racial discord between black and white troops. This had to with the practice of "dapping". For some reason, Stoddard never mentioned it was a racial thing, but in Cecil B. Curry's book "Long Binh Jail", it certainly was. Curry wrote as follows: "Black Power had become an issue that rent at the fabric of American society by 1967-1968. Clenched fist salutes, Afro hairstyles, and motto's such as "Black is beautiful" became symbols of solidarity among African Americans, and they sought to emphasize "black pride" among the people of their race. Social conflict raging at home soon made it's way across the Pacific to American military units assigned to Vietnam. Black troopers became "brother" to one another, whether they knew each other or not. Their shared color is what mattered. They sported the new Afro hairstyles and grew tiny beards on their lower lips in defiance of military regulations. They developed intricate hand movements to be used when meeting one another, a practice known as "dapping". They believed (sometimes correctly) that they were given the worst fatigue duties and the most dangerous patrol assignments". In discussing "dapping" and race relations, Paul Trotti in his book "Phantom Over Vietnam" had the following to say: "Another factor affecting unit morale and performance was the rise of the black-power movement in the armed forces. Though they had been in existence far longer, 1968 saw the beginnings of cohesive and effective black-power cells overseas. By 1969, the Marine Corps line units were showing the effects. Dissension in the ranks in combat could be disastrous, so when a cell was discovered, it's members would be split up. Moreover, things had come to pass in the Americal division that fraggings were becoming a routine affair, and Army personnel, black and white, were restricted from entering the M