Metamorphosis

I awakened this morning certain of only one thing. I?m in trouble. Huge trouble. Physical, mental, and emotional. The kind from which few, if any, survive. I haven't had a drink in a couple of days. So, this is what it's like. ...I know what I?m going through. I know what others will see. It no longer matters. Fear, shame, embarrassment are overcome by one inescapable fact: I was afraid I would die, when I desperately wanted to live... You see, I?d been in free-fall for such a long time, afraid I?d never land. Now, with the ground rushing to meet me, I no longer wondered if I would; instead, the greater question became, would I survive the crash? I picked up the phone and called my son. My options had run out, including denial.